The Neff Zone Column

A Cadillac News Weekly Feature 

The Neff Zone column is a weekly feature of the Cadillac News in Cadillac, Michigan. The feature began in 2004 and since then 973 columns have been published. The column appears in the Cadillac News weekend edition each Saturday.

 

Author - Jim Neff 

I am a resident of Cadillac, Michigan. I've written for a variety of publications both in print and online. These include: SKI magazine, Snow Country magazine, the Detroit News, the Chicago Tribune, AAA Living, Skiing Heritage, Traverse City magazine, Traverse magazine, Great Lakes Skier, Michigan Skier, Michigan Runner, Michigan Golfer, SkiNet, and others. In the Neff Zone column I range far and wide to comment on what I find interesting and humorous about the human condition.  


2024 Neff Zone Columns

DID YOU KNOW? -- MARCH 16, 2024

The advantage of learning new things is that you can insert them into almost any conversation. These nuggets of knowledge can establish you as a learned and wise individual. Just toss out a rhetorical “did you know” and then unleash your brilliance. 

 

SPRINGTIME SHENANIGANS -- MARCH 9, 2024

At 2:00 AM tomorrow the daylight saving time switch takes place. Add that to the recent warm weather and many of us are considering this a harbinger of spring. Transitioning to a “spring forward” mentality may require some planning.

 

STRANGE BUT TRUE -- MARCH 2, 2024

A recent article on BuzzFeed caused me to think about things that seem strange but are actually true. The article was titled: “Common Knowledge Practices That Have Become Obsolete Over Time.” 

 

MINING HEADLINE LISTS -- FEBRUARY 24, 2024

The nifty thing about headlines that tout lists is that you almost always find at least one interesting item if you drill down far enough. Mining headline lists often uncovers hidden gems. 

 

THE WAYBACK MACHINE -- FEBRUARY 17, 2024

I recently recorded another click on my life's odometer. This triggered memories of bygone days. Once you reach a certain level of “experience,” every click means there is more to remember. Cue the Wayback Machine.

 

DEFEATING THE DOLDRUMS -- FEBRUARY 3, 2024

We're in the middle of the winter doldrums. This is when we all feel sluggish, sad, and overly fatigued. One way to defeat the doldrums is to focus on news that is uplifting, inspirational, or just plain fun to know.  

  

CHOW KNOW-HOW -- JANUARY 27, 2024

The Detroit Lions are on a roll and will play for the NFC championship tomorrow. That means “watch parties” will have to be put together on the fly. Parties mean food and libations. You can add entertainment value by having some chow chatter at the ready to enhance the menu. 

 

SPORTS NOTES -- JANUARY 20, 2024

The weird weather means many of us have been sticking close to home. If you're like me, that means watching a lot of televised sports. Luckily, the NFL playoffs have helped to rescue us from cabin fever. 

 

A HEALTHY 2024 -- JANUARY 13, 2024

This is the time of year for resolutions. One hope everyone shares is for good health in the coming year. Fortunately, there are many resources available to help achieve that goal.

 

SOME GOOD IN 2023 -- JANUARY 6, 2024

Looking back on 2023, it's easy to focus on the news items that are a bit gloomy. However, a lot happened during this past year that should give us hope for the future. In some respects, 2023 was a very good year. 


2023 Neff Zone Columns

NEW YEAR'S EVE SNACKS -- DECEMBER 30, 2023

New Year's Eve is tomorrow and that means a plethora of parties will be on the docket. Christmas gatherings typically involve a big dinner, while New Year's Eve soirees generally feature an array of small snacks. This same thing applies to the news.

 

FRUITCAKE FLAPDOODLE -- DECEMBER 23, 2023

Johnny Carson once quipped on his Tonight Show: “There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.” Just on Allrecipes.com alone there are sixty-four varieties. In that spirit, today's column is a bit of fruitcake flapdoodle. Items will be tossed into the mixing bowl with no apparent organization.  

 

HOLIDAYS Q&A -- DECEMBER 16, 2023

When you're at a holidays get-together, it's always fun to pose a question and watch people go through gyrations trying to determine the answer. Observing weird facial expressions and various stages of angst can be quite entertaining. 

 

HOLIDAY REPARTEE -- DECEMBER 9, 2023

You probably will have more banter with friends and family in the next few weeks than you do in the rest of the entire year.  

Because of this, having a variety of words at your disposal is critical. 

 

HOLIDAY KNOW-HOW -- DECEMBER 2, 2023

Matriculating through the holidays can be challenging. The experience can be  less daunting if you have a a bit of holiday know-how. Luckily, acquiring this expertise is a relatively simple task. 

 

CAPTIVATING THE KIDLINGS -- NOVEMBER 25, 2023

The holiday season is upon us. You have a million things to do. Something you don't need is a squadron of whippersnappers under foot. The solution to this vexation is to give them something to do. An occupied kidling is one less item on your plate. 

 

YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF -- NOVEMBER 18, 2023

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. It's deer hunting season, so let's begin with an item for the hunters. 

 

ANTEDILUVIAN INVENTIONS -- NOVEMBER 11, 2023

Inventions from bygone days can illustrate chapters in the human experience. Many of these antediluvian items, things dating from the distant past, were revolutionary in their time period. 

 

FALL FOLLIES -- NOVEMBER 4, 2023

Daylight saving time begins tomorrow, November 5, at two o'clock in the morning, otherwise known as the Fall Follies. This is because the occurrence fosters debate regarding the merits of standard time versus daylight saving time. 

 

BOMBINATING HEADLINES -- OCTOBER 28, 2023

The purpose of a headline is to grab your attention so you want to read the attached article. A bombinated headline seeks to create a buzz of excitement. “Read on,” it exclaims. 

 

POP QUIZ -- OCTOBER 21, 2023

Every school kid since the beginning of time has dreaded the sneaky pop quiz. They come unannounced and no one is ever prepared for one. However, sometimes the quiz can actually be fun. So, here we go!

 

OCTOBER 14, 2023 -- THE STATE OF THINGS

The official state motto of Michigan is: “Si Quæris Peninsulam Amœnam Circumspice.” In English that translates to: "If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look about you.” With this in mind, it's a good time to check on how things are going in our state. 

 

OCTOBER 7, 2023 -- FAST AND LOOSE

Sometimes it's fun to rattle unencumbered through news items and facts. With no lengthy website addresses to stumble over, it's like traversing an open road with no speed bumps. With no organizational plan, it's blue highways with no GPS. So, let's do this!  

 

SEPTEMBER 30, 2023 -- IN THE KNOW

It's fun to be in the know. You know you're in the know when you know things other people are not likely to know. You know?

 

SEPTEMBER 16, 2023 -- CLOSE TO HOME

With all that's happening on the national and world stages, it's easy to lose sight of things right at our feet. Taking a deep breath and thinking about things close to home can be quite refreshing.

 

SEPTEMBER 9, 2023 -- ALTERED ASSUMPTIONS

Have you ever assumed something to be true and then discovered you were incorrect? Me too. We all have made innocent assumptions based on common misconceptions. Altering those beliefs can be enlightening and even enjoyable. 

 

SEPTEMBER 2, 2023 -- HOLIDAY HODGEPODGE

Labor Day is the semi-official end of summer. The crate beneath my desk is overflowing with a hodgepodge of items accumulated over the summer. It's time to clear out the clutter. 

 

AUGUST 26, 2023 -- TAILGATE ANODYNE CHATTER

We're quickly approaching the fall sports season and this means it's also tailgate time. The tone of these should be camaraderie and not controversy. Therefore, keeping the chatter as anodyne (inoffensive) as possible is a laudable aim. 

Choose topics with this in mind.

 

AUGUST 19, 2023 -- THINGAMAJIGS AND WATCHAMACALLITS

Have you ever forgotten the name of something? A hundred years or so ago, one of my teachers said the human mind can only remember seven things at the same time. The teacher was a nun, so who am I to question this? However, my experience tells me that seven might be overly optimistic. 

 

AUGUST 12, 2023 -- MEANDERING IN THE MESH

One of the cool things about that internet thingy is how much information is at our fingertips. Imagine a life where you'd actually have to wait ten seconds for the answer to a question. You can now unearth almost anything with just a click or swipe.  

 

AUGUST 5, 2023 -- HEALTHY THOUGHTS

I'm not a doctor and I don't play one on television. That said, I'm like everyone else who prefers to live a long and healthy life. Any news of something that helps achieve that goal is worthy of perusal. 

 

JULY 22, 2023 -- NEWS GUMSHOE

I listen to old time radio shows in the middle of the night. My favorite shows are the ones featuring gumshoes. These detectives solve the toughest crimes by uncovering clues and information often missed by those not privy to private eye insights.  I try to apply the same diligence to the news.

 

JULY 15, 2023 -- HOME SWEET HOME?

Housing is in the news lately. The common theme is that there is not enough housing and what does exist is too expensive. 

With this in mind, it's no wonder that many current home owners are choosing to stay put and renovate what they already own.

 

JULY 8, 2023 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.  

 

JULY 1, 2023 -- NONCONTROVERSIAL CONFABULATION

As we enter the Fourth of July holiday period, it's important to have safe conversation topics ready to roll out at any given soiree. Being the center of congenial chitchat can even be quite gratifying. 

 

JUNE 24, 2023 -- SURPRISES ON THE SITOOTERIE

The simple things in life sometimes provide the most pleasure. Mornings spent on our sitooterie (back porch) reading newspapers is an absolute craic (enjoyable time) for me. Things get even better when I come across news items that are surprising. Luckily, these are surprisingly easy to find.  

 

JUNE 17, 2023 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

With the opening of the Cadillac Farmers Market this week, thoughts naturally turn to food. Luckily, there has been quite a selection of food-related tidbits in the news recently. 

 

JUNE 10, 2023 -- USEFUL INFORMATION

Do others tell you that you are a font of useless information? Do they contend that flapdoodle occupies most of your brain's storage space? If so, sneak up on the doubters with some items that are interesting and maybe even useful. That will put a cork in their criticism. 

 

JUNE 3, 2023 -- NOTHING

This column won't take long to read because it's about nothing. This is a practice called “Niksen” by our friends in the Netherlands. I am not the smartest wafer in the windmill cookie carton, but even I can tell when nothing could actually be something. 

 

MAY 27, 2023 -- MEMORIAL DAY Q&A

When you're at a gathering of family and friends this weekend, it's a safe strategy to never ask a question unless you already know the answer. This is a smooth way to steer conversations into amicable territory. A nice Q&A can even turn out to be quite a lot of fun.

 

MAY 20, 2023 -- SEEN EVERYTHING?

Some of us reach a point in life when we think we've seen everything there is to see. Nothing surprises us anymore. But wait! Don't be too presumptuous. Things can sneak up on you when you least expect it. 

 

MAY 13, 2023 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.  

 

MAY 6, 2023 -- STATS IN STORIES

Here's the thing about statistics. Sometimes the stats are contained within a story. Sometimes the stats are the story. Whatever the case may be, something interesting is usually the result. 

 

APRIL 29, 2023 -- SUMMER RELATED

As you shrug off your winter coat for the umpteenth time, aren't you about ready to think about summer? It would be a nice change to stand in front of a barbecue grill dressed in something other than a snowmobile suit. Summer related musings are a must right now so you can retain your sanity. 

 

APRIL 22, 2023 -- DON'T BE A SCOFFLAW

Most of us would like to think that we are law-abiding citizens. As such, a basic knowledge of current laws is part of being an informed member of society. 

 

APRIL 15, 2023 -- LIGHT AND BREEZY

Spring is a good time to take a deep breath and recharge. Thinking light and breezy thoughts is a nice respite from the serious affairs of the day. 

 

APRIL 8, 2023 -- HEALTH SPIZZERINCTUM

With Easter tomorrow comes a sense of renewal. This is perfect timing for focusing your health. With a good measure of spizzerinctum (determination or zeal), we can all improve our well-being. 

 

APRIL1, 2023 -- NO FOOLING

With today being April Fools Day, it's appropriate to cover some news that generates a fitting response. These are items that might cause you to react with a genuine feeling of surprise. No fooling!

 

MARCH 25, 2023 -- SPRING THINGS

Spring has sprung, sort of. This is the time of year when the weather has the hiccups. However, as we crawl and stumble toward spring, thoughts turn to renewal and rejuvenation. It's time to think springy things. 

 

MARCH 18, 2023 -- REALITY AND STUFF

Well kidlings, on occasion we play a round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. This time we're putting a little twist on the game. There is a lot of reality that is just plain reality. 

 

MARCH 11, 2023 -- CRAZINESS FROM THE CRATE

The crate beneath my desk is overflowing. This is where news items that did not surface in past columns accumulate. It's time to dive in and see what oddities are lurking within. 

 

MARCH 4, 2023 -- PISTACHIOS AND PECULIARITIES

Humans are an eccentric bunch. You can prove this by tossing a peculiarity into any conversation. Then you can just stand back and enjoy the puzzled reactions. It's quite entertaining. 

 

FEBRUARY 25, 2023 -- PERCENTAGES AND NUMBERS

There are quite a few studies and reports in the news. Many of these tell us a lot about ourselves. The percentages and numbers can sometimes reveal interesting conclusions. 

 

FEBRUARY 18, 2023 -- CATCHING UP

The Neff Zone was on hiatus last week, so a bit of catching up is in order. The Super Bowl was viewed by estimated 113 million people, so let's begin with that. 

 

FEBRUARY 4, 2023 -- SUPER TASTE TREATS

The Super Bowl is February 12 and that means there is barely enough time for important preparations. The critical element is deciding on the menu for your Super Bowl party. 

 

JANUARY 28, 2023 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.  

 

JANUARY 21, 2023 -- FOR YOUR HEALTH

As we begin the new year, everyone wants to be healthy. Good health is a common universal goal. Fortunately, there is a wealth of useful health-related information readily available. 

 

JANUARY 14, 2023 -- YOUR FUTURE ON PARADE

The Consumer Electronics Show was this week in Las Vegas. It's billed as the most influential tech event in the world. Part of the array of the coolest of the cool are things that could actually filter down to the everyday lives of we common folk. 

 

JANUARY 7, 2023 -- ON THE HOME FRONT

There's no place like home. This is especially true when the holidays are over and all your relatives have departed. The idea of what makes a good home is an interesting topic. 


2022 Neff Zone Columns

DECEMBER 31, 2022 -- WRAPPING UP 2022

The hope is that finding things that interest me will also interest you. So, as 2022 draws to a close, I have a few items with which to wrap up the year. 

 

DECEMBER 24, 2022 -- BLIZZARD FUN INDOORS

With a blizzard raging outdoors, a priority for maintaining your holiday sanity is the have interesting things to do indoors. Boredom does not have to be the rule of the day.

 

DECEMBER 17, 2022 -- HOLIDAY ODDS AND ENDS

We're sneaking up on Christmas and there are seemingly a million things yet to do. Most of these odds and ends are small, but they can drive you to distraction unless they are checked off your to-do list. Here in the Neff Zone, that list consists of informational tidbits. 

 

DECEMBER 10, 2022 -- MORE NATTERING AND ODDITIES

Last week's Neff Zone offered some suggestions for nattering at holiday parties – friendly, informal conversation topics. A dive into the crate beneath my desk has yielded even more material ranging from interesting to odd. 

 

DECEMBER 3, 2022 -- NATTERFICATION 

This is the time of year when gatherings of every ilk take place. A lot of nattering is bound to happen – friendly, informal conversation. Having topics at the ready will afford you maximum natterfication. 

 

NOVEMBER 26, 2022 -- ALL ABOUT MICHIGAN

Another holiday season is upon us. The Neff Zone tradition has always been to focus only on fun things during this period and this year will be no different. If some smiles are generated along the way then all the better. Some interesting things about Michigan is a good starting point. 

 

NOVEMBER 19, 2022 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

The holidays are upon us. I know this because cheesy holiday movies are already airing on television and my fridge is stocked with Christmas ales. With Thanksgiving next week, thoughts turn to the big meal and family fun. 

 

NOVEMBER 12, 2022 -- A BREATH OF NOTHING

Are you ready to take a respite from all the political wrangling? I mean, enough is enough! It's time to think of something else. Sometimes it's refreshing to just take a deep breath and think of nothing very important. 

 

NOVEMBER 5, 2022 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint. 

 

OCTOBER 29, 2022 -- THE STATE OF THINGS

There's a lot happening on the national scene. Given that, it's a good time to take a tour of the states to see what's going on. We wouldn't want to miss out on anything important. 

 

OCTOBER 15, 2022 -- FLYING CARS AND ROBOTS

Computer scientist Alan Kay once said: “Technology is anything invented after you were born, everything else is just stuff.” In other words, technology experienced by today's children is vastly different from anything that came before. 

 

OCTOBER 8, 2022 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

What's on the menu? Most of us ask this question on a regular basis. Meals and snacks are often the highlights on a daily agenda.

 

OCTOBER 1, 2022 -- OLD AND NEW

One thing that's interesting about the news is that some topics stand the test of time. On occasion, something that has been reappears as something that is now. Old news has a habit of becoming new news. 

 

SEPTEMBER 24, 2022 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.  

 

SEPTEMBER 17, 2022 -- WHAT'S NEW

Are you getting tired of the same old, same old? Do not despair. The are plenty of new things happening every day. All you need to do is take a step back once in a while and check the big picture on the box. 

 

SEPTEMBER 10, 2022 -- ON THE BUS

Labor Day has come and gone. Schools are now in session. This means that “experienced” people can regale whippersnappers about how easy today's students have it compared to conditions back in the day. 

 

SEPTEMBER 3, 2022 -- LABOR DAY SCHMOOZE

Labor Day traditionally signals the end of summer. It's a holiday that generates all sorts of soirees, picnics, and tailgates. The trick to surviving these is to have some schmooze ready topics at your disposal. 

 

AUGUST 27, 2022 -- HAPPY DATA

Are you happy? The answer to that question is a tad complicated, but the researchers in the hinterlands have been diligent in their quest to provide us with the data necessary to make an educated guess. 

 

AUGUST 13, 2022 -- NOTHING IN PARTICULAR

Are you suffering from brain fatigue? Is your noggin filled to overflowing with complicated thoughts about all the issues swirling around us? If so, it might be a good time to take a break and think about nothing in particular. 

 

AUGUST 6, 2022 -- SEGUE STRETCHERS

Well kids, it's time to clear out the items from the crate beneath my desk. These are random leftovers from research not used in previous columns. I may have to stretch a segue to link items, so groaning is permitted.

 

JULY 30, 2022 -- INTERESTING ECONOMICS

I am not an economist and I do not play one on television. In fact, a dearth of math skills precludes me from any management notions regarding our family budget. Still, that does not mean I am not interested in news about economics. 

 

JULY 23, 2022 -- YOU CAN'TAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. Usually we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint, but this time around we'll report on something about the entire state of Michigan. 

 

JULY 16, 2022 -- NIFTY IDEAS

There are terrific thinkers among us. These visionaries are constantly developing ideas that have the potential to make our lives better. Some ideas are really “out there,” while others are down-to-earth dandy. 

 

JULY 9, 2022 -- GOOD FOR YOU

Sometimes it's comforting to learn about things that are good for you. There are many simple strategies we can all use that have the potential to make life better. More complicated does not necessarily mean a certainty of positive results. 

 

JULY 2, 2022 -- INFLAMMABLE FOURTH

The word “inflammable” is interesting because it can mean opposite things at the same time. The prefix “in” can mean “not,” but it can also mean “tending toward.” Thus, something “inflammable” cannot burst into flames or it can tend to catch fire easily. 

Topics for conversations at Independence Day gatherings can present the same conundrum. 

 

JUNE 25, 2022 -- ALL MICHIGAN

With all that's going on in the world, we sometimes lose focus on what's cool about our own state. There are a lot of interesting Michigan stories all around us. What we have to do is stop and take a look. 

 

JUNE 18, 2022 -- SMILES FOR ALL

Do you just want to take a deep breath and think about nothing for a while? Would something that could possibly induce a smile be of interest to you? Well, there are things “out there” that might be the ticket. 

 

JUNE 11, 2022 -- CRAZY BUT TRUE

Sometimes you come across an item that seems a bit crazy. The shocker hits home when you learn the crazy thing is actually true. The good news is that these head-scratches are often fun and even humorous.

 

JUNE 4, 2022 -- MY AFFLICTION

I have an affliction when it comes to the news. I am drawn to items containing lists as if they are magnetized. Luckily, contained in those lists are usually some knowledge nuggets, so I come away with information that is always interesting and sometimes even useful. 

 

MAY 28, 2022 -- MEMORIAL DAY CHATTER

Memorial Day supposedly marks the first day of summer. Theoretically, it's a day when you can put away your snowblower. The day also begins the time of year for a schedule of picnics, open houses, and reunions. This means you'll need plenty of chat-worthy topics at your disposal. 

 

MAY 21, 2022 -- TO YOUR HEALTH

I am not a graduate of the Google University of Medicine. I do not watch General Hospital. Still, I am always interested in news items pertaining to a person's overall health and well being. 

 

MAY 14, 2022 -- WORK RELATED

“If you don't like your job go find another one.” How often have you heard that advice? Well, over the last couple of years many Americans have taken that wisdom to heart and that has led to record job openings. The world of work is changing at a furious pace.

 

MAY 7, 2022 -- NEWS ROULETTE

When you spin the news roulette wheel the little marble can land anywhere. Its resting place is totally random. That's why roulette is a game of chance and it can be both exciting and excruciating at the same time. In news roulette every spin produces different results and that's the fun of the game. 

 

APRIL 30, 2022 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS FUTURISTIC STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. This time, as a twist, items with a futuristic theme will be the focus.

 

APRIL 23, 2022 -- IN THE MEANTIME

While we all wait for the slightest hint of a spring thaw,  it's a good time to stock up on some interesting facts to toss into conversations on the off chance lake effect snow won't derail July picnics.

 

APRIL 16, 2022 -- MONEY TALK

I've been watching the opening games of the Detroit Tigers baseball season and this has led me to thoughts of money. The commercials are dominated by ads for all the various sports book services. Quite frankly, these have left me scratching my head. 

 

APRIL 9, 2022 -- AI IS A NEW REALITY

Whether you're ready or not, AI is here and it's only going to get more commonplace. You may even have had recent encounters with AI and not given it a second thought. 

 

APRIL 2, 2022 -- ANIMAL TALES

Because a lot has been going on in the human world, it's been easy to overlook  things happening in the realm of animals. Now might be a good time to take a deep breath and consider some of the other inhabitants of our planet. 

 

MARCH 26, 2022 -- NOT WHAT YOU THINK

 Humility can be a wonderful thing. There is nothing that can reduce your hat size faster than a big slice of humble pie. On the other hand, course corrections can be exciting and illuminating. 

 

MARCH 19, 2022 -- THE GOOFY SEASON

This is the time of year when things get a bit goofy. The best strategy is to go with the flow and even jump in with both feet. Goofy has great entertainment value, if nothing else.

 

MARCH 12, 2022 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. Usually we begin with an item from Rob's stomping grounds of Flint, but this time around we'll report from nearby Saginaw Bay. 

 

MARCH 5, 2022 -- YOU FOLLOW UP

It's time you did some of the work around here. Usually, I provide all the items and research contained in a column. For a change, this time around I am going to toss out some minimum information and let you do the follow up. Roll up your sleeves. Here we go. 

 

FEBRUARY 26, 2022 -- USELESS INFORMATION

According to my family and friends, I am a repository of useless information. Much of what I find interesting has no monetary capabilities. On the other hand, I am ready if a random game of Jeopardy beaks out. 

 

FEBRUARY 19, 2022 -- HOME SWEET HOME

Do you suffer from cabin fever? Have you been watching too many home improvement shows on television? Do you have a compulsion to attack a load-bearing wall with a sledge hammer? All this could mean you are in a danger zone. Plus, it also means you are completely normal. 

 

FEBRUARY 12, 2022 -- JUST HAVE FUN

Super Bowl Sunday is upon us and I have a request to submit to you. Please just have fun.

 

FEBRUARY 5, 2022 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF - EXTREME EDITION

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. For this edition we're going to extremes, so hang on to your fedora. 

 

JANUARY 29, 2022 -- THE STATE OF THINGS

Every once in a while it's fun to look around the United States to see just how those states are doing. Luckily, there are all sorts of polls and rankings that make the task easier. The observations are sometimes revealing and always entertaining. 

 

JANUARY 22, 2022 -- ODD QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

 There are plenty of odd things going on all around us. You don't even need to search very hard to find them. Sometimes you may have a question about the oddity. Odder still, there may actually be an odd answer. What are the odds of that?

 

JANUARY 15, 2022 -- TECHNOLOGY NOW AND BEEN

Technology is only technology if it was invented after you were born. Otherwise it's the way things have always been. Today, even that “always been” is changing by the minute. 

 

JANUARY 8, 2022 -- GET IN THE FLOW

This is the time of the new year when resolutions are made. Many of those resolutions will be aimed at making our lives better. In short, out with the negative and in with the positive. It turns out there's a term for this goal – flow.  


2021 Neff Zone Columns

DECEMBER 31, 2021 -- ONWARD TO 2022

With 2021 in the rear view mirror, it's onward to 2022. You'll see all sorts of prognostications trying to predict what the coming year will bring. Be assured there are some things coming in 2022 that will be interesting and even enjoyable.

 

DECEMBER 24, 2021 -- SOME GOOD IN 2021

“Into each life some rain must fall.” That's a line from the poem "The Rainy Day" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. If that's true, then for most of us 2021 seemed like a monsoon. Considering all of the trials and tribulations of the past year, it's a bit of a surprise to learn that in some respects it was a very good year.

 

DECEMBER 18, 2021 -- SAFE TOPICS

We're at that time of year when get-togethers are on the docket. Admittedly, we're still in the caution-first mode, but with trepidation in mind we still need some safe topics to discuss at such soirees. 

 

DECEMBER 11, 2021 -- HOLIDAY TRADITIONS

This is the time of year when everyone seems to be in a rush. This being the case, it may be a prime opportunity to reverse that trend and stop to smell the poinsettias. 

 

DECEMBER 4 2021 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. Big Rob is a music fan, so we begin with something from that realm. 

 

NOVEMBER 27, 2021 -- CATS, DOGS AND AN ALMOST BEAR

While many of us are swept up in Black Friday madness, life goes on pretty much as usual for our animals. As long as the humans keep delivering treats, our pets are good to go. 

 

NOVEMBER 20, 2021 -- THANKSGIVING TREATS

Thanksgiving is the harbinger of another holiday season. The Neff Zone tradition has always been to focus on only fun things during this period and this year will be no different. If some smiles are generated along the way then all the better. 

 

NOVEMBER 13, 2021 -- SOME GOOD NEWS

All of us are due for some good news. In many respects, the last two years have been akin to hitting yourself in the noggin with a ball peen hammer. All is not doom and gloom, however, because it turns out that you live in the best place on earth. All you have to do is hang in there.

 

NOVEMBER 6, 2021 -- FINAL COLUMN?

This may be my final column. You see, if I play my cards right I could be a multi-millionaire by this time next week. I will no longer have time to write columns because all of my efforts will go toward spending the $50 million dollars (or so) I am about to acquire.

 

OCTOBER 30, 2021 -- ENTERTAINING FACTS

The crate beneath my desk runneth over. The facts stored therein are spilling out and nibbling at my toes. Ah, but I know what to do. Stuff the serious items in the recycle bin and rescue the ones that are entertaining and perhaps even fun. 

 

OCTOBER 23, 2021 -- STRANGE OCCURRENCES

If you can clear your head of the political shenanigans going on, you'll notice that there is other strangeness occurring in the world. Tapping into this wellspring of oddities can be interesting and enlightening.  

 

OCTOBER 16, 2021 -- IN THE KNOW

In the near future, you may wake up in the morning knowing only half of what you knew when you went to bed the night before. This is assuming, of course, that you knew everything in the world that there was to know in the first place. 

 

OCTOBER 9, 2021 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual,  when we play this game, we begin with an item from Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.

 

OCTOBER 2, 2021 -- AN EXERCISE IN KINDNESS

Have you felt a bit drained lately? Have you experienced a diminished amount of energy? If so, you are not alone. “These struggles are not new, but they are intensifying.”

 

SEPTEMBER 25, 2021 -- ACCUMULATION OF FACTS

As I peruse the news facts accumulate on my desktop. When it gets to the point when the stack blocks the view of my computer screen, it's time to pass along items of interest, some serious and some not so serious. 

 

SEPTEMBER 18, 2021 -- STRANGE TIMES

We are living in strange times, indeed. How strange? This has nothing to do with politics. Is that strange enough for you? Some things are so strange even politicians can't top them. 

 

SEPTEMBER 11, 2021 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Everyone has a favorite food. For me, if chocolate or peanut butter is involved, I'm in. What got me thinking about food was a recent article about baloney. 

 

SEPTEMBER 4, 2021 -- LABOR DAY ADVICE 

Labor Day soirees can sometimes involve many age groups all in the same spot. Because of this, the more experienced members of the group might have the urge to offer some sage wisdom to the whippersnappers in the throng.

 

AUGUST 28, 2021 -- FLAPDOODLE AND BALDERDASH

With Labor Day almost upon us and the football tailgating season just beginning, many of us will gather with friends and family. There are a zillion and one conversation topics at our disposal. If you eliminate politics that still leaves a zillion. 

 

AUGUST 21, 2021 -- SUMMER CRUISING

During the dog days of August it's a perfect time to roll down the car windows and cruise around. If you have no plan, you never know what you'll encounter. That's the point.

 

AUGUST 14, 2021 -- INTERESTING STARTS

We passed a milestone last week. “On August 6, 1991, the first website was introduced to the world.” There are 1.9 billion websites today. That got me wondering how other things got their starts. So, naturally, I went to the Internet to find out.

 

JULY 31, 2021 -- RANDOM BITS

Sometimes, when you're reading along minding your own business, you can  find some really interesting bits of information that are hiding in larger news articles. This happens to me quite often. I've accumulated some of these random bits.

 

JULY 24, 2021 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

JULY 17, 2021 -- FEELING GOOD

Coming out of the pandemic and emerging from our personal cocoons has most people feeling a bit giddy. Feeling bad is no picnic. Feeling good is a lot more fun. Luckily, some simple strategies may help us shake off the doldrums and march headlong into the light. 

 

JULY 10, 2021 -- NOT SO SMUG

Sometimes we humans think we're more intelligent than is indisputably the case. From time to time it may be a good idea to do a reality check. After all, a little dose of humility could be beneficial. 

 

JUNE 26, 2021 -- DID YOU KNOW?

Fourth of July celebrations are almost upon us. As we emerge from our pandemic bunkers, reuniting with friends and family is uppermost on our agendas. With this in mind, it's a prime opportunity to “wow” folks with some interesting conversation starters. A good way to begin is to lead with the phrase: “Did you know?” 

 

JUNE 19, 2021 -- OUT OF KILTER

Have you noticed the world seems to be a little out of kilter? Politics aside, things are going on that seem to be a tad off, sort of like having a dizzy spell. It's like the road out of the pandemic still needs some pothole repair. 

 

JUNE 12, 2021 -- LET'S TALK

Summer is upon us and going to non-pandemic gatherings will be a great relief.  Because of this pent up enthusiasm, it will be more important than ever to have a wide range of topics to discuss, preferably things that won't incite a fist fight. Luckily, a wide variety of these are easy to find. 

 

MAY 29, 2021 -- MORE IN THE FUTURE

Last week's column dealt with some pretty fantastic things that may be in your future. Well, as they say about those products Made for TV: “Wait, there's more!” The simple truth is that what seems ridiculously far-fetched today could be commonplace at some point.

 

MAY 22, 2021 -- INTO THE FUTURE

After enduring the past eighteen months, the last thing most of us want to do is gaze into our rear view mirrors. Luckily, there is plenty in our future to keep us interested and engaged. 

 

MAY 15, 2021 -- TIME TO CHILL

This past year has been a tough haul. The past twelve months seemingly have lasted about a decade. Stress levels have been in the red zone of the Stress-O-Meter. 

 

MAY 8, 2021 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, when we play this game, we begin with an item from Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint. This time around something happening in Flint is not really bad, it's just a tad odd. 

 

MAY 1, 2021 -- LIST VINDICATION

I love the smell of vindication in the morning! I have often stated my predilection for making lists using just pen and paper. Be gone, you doubters. My “less is more” approach has been validated. 

 

APRIL 24, 2021 -- SAY WHAT?

Have you ever read or heard something that caused you to react with surprise?  Your response might even border on shock. “Say what? Are you kidding me?” Recently, I have had several “say what” moments. 

 

APRIL 17, 2021 -- OFF THE BEATEN PATH

Interesting news can sometimes come from off the beaten path. While the big stories of the day grab the front page headlines, some smaller developments may be worth attention in their own right. 

 

APRIL 3, 2021 -- THE WAY TO HAPPINESS

This past year has been tough on everyone, to say the least. How bad was it? So bad I am reminded of a tale of woe titled “The Old Philosopher.” It was a a one-hit wonder recording that made the Billboard Top 40 in 1956. 

 

MARCH 27, 2021 -- THE DIRTY DOZEN

Spring has sprung and for many people that signals the annual ritual known as spring cleaning. I do enjoy removing the hubris of winter. So, when I looked at the dusty accumulation of items in the crate beneath my desk I knew it was time to do some selective sorting.

 

MARCH 20, 2021 -- SOMETHING FISHY

Sometimes one thought leads to another. Before you know it dots you did not even know existed have been connected. Hence, a small germ of a thought morphs into an entire line of thought. This happened to me recently when I read an article about Asian carp. 

 

MARCH 13, 2021 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual,  when we play this game, we begin with an item from Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint. 

 

MARCH 6, 2021 -- I AM GOING TO BE RICH!

This may be my last column for the Cadillac News. You see, I recently found out that I am going to be rolling in dough. I am going to be so rich that it will take all of my time and energy just to spend even a fraction of my new wealth. 

 

FEBRUARY 27, 2021 -- ANIMALS ON THE EDGE

How bad is this stay at home business? It's so bad even animals are on edge. They have had enough snow, enough cold, and enough of being cooped up in the house. 

 

FEBRUARY 20, 2021 -- FUTURE PREDICTIONS

Who could have predicted what 2020 would have in store for us? Prognostication is fun, but hitting the bullseye requires a hefty measure of knowledge mixed with a modicum of pure luck. 

 

FEBRUARY 13, 2021 -- STIR CRAZY?

It's a double whammy. As if being quarantined by the virus was not enough, now we're being quarantined by the unrelenting cold. Is it any wonder why were all getting a bit stir crazy?

 

FEBRUARY 6, 2021 -- USELESS INFORMATION

A reader gave me a compliment last week. “I enjoy the five minutes of unusable information you dispense each week.” This may not seem like kudos to you, but to me it is music to my ears. 

 

JANUARY 30,2021 -- JUST MESSING WITH ME

Did you ever have the feeling that the universe was just messing with your head? Is there some sort of practical joke being pulled? I get this feeling on a regular basis when I read the news. You too? 

 

JANUARY 22, 2021 -- TONIGHT, WE ARE ALL VIKINGS

For the first time in the history of Cadillac High School football the Vikings will play for a state championship. If there's such a thing as sending out positive vibes, a tsunami of support is behind the team. 

 

JANUARY 16, 2021 -- ODDBALL STUFF

Is your tank empty? Is that how you're feeling, Bunky? Well, there's a name for your condition – emotional exhaustion. Well, if this is your state of being, perhaps a respite is in order. 

 

JANUARY 9, 2021 -- MEANWHILE, BACK ON EARTH

They could be out there – or not. While we common folk have been busy with our everyday lives, scientists have been looking to the stars and beyond. I'm not sure if we should be intrigued or run screaming into the night.  

 

JANUARY 2, 2021 -- THE ROARING TWENTIES

My first read everyday in the Cadillac News is the “Today in history” feature. One item always dates back one hundred years ago and I find those particularly interesting. 


2020 Neff Zone Columns

DECEMBER 26, 2020 -- YEAR-END POTPOURRI

The year 2020 is drawing to a close and for most of us it's good riddance. This is a great time to cast aside the remaining flotsam and jetsam that has been accumulating so we can get a fresh start in 2021.  

 

DECEMBER 19, 2020 -- FOR THE KIDLINGS

Christmas is less than a week away, so the kidlings are getting restless. The challenge is trying to keep things on an even keel while recognizing that anticipation is at a maximum level. What to do?

 

DECEMBER 12, 2020 -- THE PERFECT TOY

These days Americans don't seem to agree about much. However, even as tempers flare and fingers jab, there is one thing about which we all seem to agree upon. On Christmas every child should receive a toy. 

 

DECEMBER 5, 2020 -- DRUNK SQUIRRELS AND TRANQUILITY

We all could use a respite from the important news of the day. To that end, there is nothing that lightens the atmosphere like some offbeat shenanigans. 

 

NOVEMBER 28, 2020 -- MOOSE LICKS AND ODDITIES

The Neff Zone tradition has always been to focus on only fun things during this period and this year will be no different. If some smiles are generated along the way then all the better. To get the snowball rolling, I begin with some good advice: “Do not let a moose lick your car."

 

NOVEMBER 21, 2020 -- THANKSGIVING TALK

It does not matter whether you are celebrating Thanksgiving in person or on Zoom. When you connect with family members you need some talking points. After “how's the weather,” it's important to keep the discussion moving along in order to avoid awkward silences. 

 

NOVEMBER 14, 2020 -- CADILLAC ZOOM CITY?

Are you ready for some pie in the sky? Something outside the box? Something that may seem like a “no way” now, but is intriguing enough to generate a “way” if you think about the future?  

 

NOVEMBER 7, 2020 -- ACTION IN THE ANIMAL KINGDOM

There are strange things happening in the animal kingdom. I know what you're thinking, but this column has nothing to do with politics. Recently there has been a stampede of news about actual animals. 

 

OCTOBER 31, 2020 -- SCIENCE LEANINGS

When they handed out the science genes I was at the back of the line. That said, in some sort of weird juxtaposition, news items with a leaning toward the scientific interest me.

 

OCTOBER 24, 2020 -- TEN FUN THINGS

Are you ready to take a deep breath and chill for a minute? This year has been crazy, so maybe a bit of a respite is in order. You know (and this may be difficult to fathom), there are some fun things in the news these days. 

 

OCTOBER 17, 2020 -- NEANDERTHALS AND CRESTICKLES

One aspect of the pandemic is that there seems to be a lot more attention being given to health and how our bodies work. 

When I read the news of the day, items about the human condition are always of interest. 

 

OCTOBER 10, 2020 -- ADDICTED TO LISTS

I'm a list guy. I make lists for everything, big and small. Eventually, I will experience one of the simple joys of life when I get to cross that item off my list. Ah, I love the sight of a string of completed tasks with lines through them.

 

OCTOBER 3, 2020 -- ENTANGLED NEWS

Whenever you read a newspaper or watch a news broadcast the COVID-19 pandemic is sure to be front and center. It's inextricably interwoven with almost every other news topic. Even items with seemingly no connection are entangled. 

 

SEPTEMBER 26, 2020 -- QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

There is so much going on in the world today that burning questions abound. I have burning questions. You have burning questions. But where are the answers to those burning questions? Well, for some of those the answers are here. 

 

SEPTEMBER 19, 2020 -- FOOTBALL CONTROVERSIES

High school football started this weekend. High school football (and football in general) has gone through some major shifts over the years. I personally lived through three of these changes that were a bit controversial at the time. 

*THIS COLUMN WAS NOT PUBLISHED IN THE CADILLAC NEWS IN PRINT OR ONLINE. 

 

SEPTEMBER 12, 2020 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

SEPTEMBER 5, 2020 -- LABOR DAY FUN

Labor Day is signals the end of summer. The days are getting shorter and the temps cooler. This Labor Day is also a touchstone for me because it marks Neff Zone column number 800. So, onward with the holiday festivities!

 

AUGUST 29, 2020 -- WISE GUY HAT

Over the past several months I've watched way too much television. You too? Part of that viewing has been taken up with a few hundred episodes of various house hunting shows. You know, the ones where buyers are shown three choices and they pick one. In our abode we lump all these shows together under the title “stupid people,” as in “let's watch some stupid people tonight.” 

 

AUGUST 22, 2020 -- PLENTY TO DO

Summer is winding down. I know this because I already have two varieties of Octoberfest beer in my fridge. You may be looking for things to do to get ready for the change of seasons. Luckily, projects abound and there is plenty to do. 

 

AUGUST 15, 2020 -- INTERESTING TECHNOLOGY

Several interesting tech developments have recently come to my attention. Some are amazingly simple. Some are amazingly complex. Some are just, well, amazing. 

 

AUGUST 8, 2020 -- NEW OLD SCHOOL

“Got milk?” Remember those ads from the dairy industry? That tag line was retired six years ago. But wait! It's back. Milk is enjoying new popularity, partly thanks to a resurgence of some old school traditions. 

 

JULY 25, 2020 -- SUMMERTIME LIVIN'

“Summertime, an' the livin' is easy” proclaims the 1935 song by George Gershwin. Given the stressful summer underway right now it may seem like those lyrics are a stretch, but there are a few things that do fit Gershwin's theme. 

 

JULY 18, 2020 -- DON'T THINK ABOUT IT

With all that's going on in the world these days it's easy to come down with a case of severe noggin overload. Well, how about a challenge? I am going to give you some stuff that falls into the “I don't even want to think about it” category. Your task is to not think about these things. 

 

JULY 3, 2020 -- THINKING IN THE SHADE

This is the Fourth of July weekend and the temperatures are going to be firecracker hot. What better time to sit under that shade tree in the backyard and  beat the heat with a frosty beverage in hand and random thoughts about nothing in general. You know, sometimes you just need to pause life and check the picture on the box. 

 

JUNE 27, 2020 -- AROUND THE EDGES

Pick up any newspaper and a large number of articles are about COVID-19. It's important to keep up with all the important developments. Added to these, however,  is news that is semi-pandemic related but not of a critical nature. These stories exist around the edges of the main story. 

  

JUNE 20, 2020 -- THE OLD AND THE NEW

When reading the news, it's fun to see stories that reach back into the past mixed with articles that look into the future. One example was just done by 24/7 Wall Street and has to do with the year you were born.

 

JUNE 13, 2020 -- UNDER THE RADAR

Just when you thought all the news had been narrowed to a few key topics, it turns out that a lot has been going on under the radar. It's difficult to imagine right now, but time does march on. 

 

MAY 30, 2020 -- CATEGORICALLY WEIRD

With everything that has been going on over the past few months you might think you've seen all the weird news that's fit to print. Not so fast, my friends. There is so much weirdness afoot that some of it fell through the cracks. Pick a category and there is a weird news item lurking therein. 

 

MAY 23, 2020 -- THE EYE OF THE NEEDLE

When it comes to reopening America I have no answers. Not to offend anyone's sensibilities, but what about restrooms? 

 

MAY 16, 2020 -- SCOURING THE NEWS

Right now, I have a bit more time to scour the news. It's almost like a treasure hunt to seek and find items of interest. For example, with a pandemic virus and murder hornets dominating the storylines, you might think there is nothing more to fear. Not so fast, my friends. 

 

MAY 2, 2020 -- GO BANANAS WITH A RIDDLE AND SOME HOOPS PHYSICS 

Everyone is looking for something to do in these trying times. If you're looking for something to fill your waking hours, how about a few things that will involve your mind and your body? 

 

APRIL 25,2020 -- A BUNCH OF SOFTIES

When it comes to toilet paper We Americans a just a bunch of softies. Sure, we may talk tough, but the bottom line is that we'd rather wrestle a rabid skunk than face an empty toilet paper cardboard roll.

 

APRIL 18, 2020 -- THE GRIMY HISTORY OF HAND WASHING

“Stay calm and wash your hands” seems like an obvious message in these trying times. However, this simple task took a long time to be recognized as beneficial. Hand washing has traveled a somewhat grimy road to get to where we are today. 

 

APRIL 11, 2020 -- VIRUS NEWS ON THE FRINGE

Every newspaper and newscast is chock full of major COVID-19 stories. However, there are stories that are smaller and exist on the fringes of virus news.

 

MARCH 28, 2020 -- A VIRTUAL CONGRESS

One thing about being in shelter-in-place mode is that it gives us plenty of time to think. Thinking sometimes leads to discussion. At the end of the process there may even be a great idea. What got me chugging along this train of thought was a recent article in Politico. They surveyed thirty smart, macro thinkers. What they are thinking is interesting, to say the least. 

 

MARCH 21, 2020 -- TIME TO CELEBRATE

Things are grim right now. It would be different if there was light at the end of this tunnel, except it seems like we can't even find the tunnel. What to do? It's obvious. Celebrate! In these trying times you may not feel like celebrating is in order. Well, that's because you don't know what day it is. 

 

MARCH 14, 2020 -- ECHOES IN AN EMPTY GYM

A basketball game with no spectators allowed? Been there and done that. With events limiting spectator attendance due to the Coronavirus, I am reminded of a time when I was involved in a similar scenario.

 

FEBRUARY 29, 2020 -- NEWS WITH A TWIST

Some news items are just straightforward information, so you can consider them and then go merrily on your way. Other news items, however, may have a subtle twist that leads to further rumination. These pesky “news thoughts” can reside in the back of your mind and tap you on the shoulder when you least expect it. 

 

FEBRUARY 15, 2020 -- RANDOM FROM THE CRATE

Spring is on the horizon. Really! Because of this it's a good time to do some spring cleaning. That means a dive into the crate beneath my desk to thin out a repository of interesting items that are totally random.

 

FEBRUARY 1, 2020 -- OLD AGE, MEAT CLEAVERS AND ICE CREAM

Old age, meat cleavers and ice cream may not appear to have much in common. However, what if these seemingly unconnected things could be three keys to your personal happiness? 

 

JANUARY 25, 2020 -- THE SEVEN THOUGHT THEORY

One of the nuns at Flint St. Michael High School told us that it was impossible for the human mind to remember more than seven things at any one time. I don't know if this is true, but if you can't believe a nun who can you believe? 

 

JANUARY 18, 2020 -- TECHNOLOGY MARCHES ON

Whether we like it or not, technology is dragging us headlong into the future. A person can choose to be a Luddite (a person opposed to new technology), but that does not mean they won't be touched by it. There is no escape.

 

JANUARY 11, 2020 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, there is no better way to begin the new year than with another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 


2019 Neff Zone Columns

DECEMBER 21, 2019 -- ODDITIES FROM THE CRATE

As the year comes to a close it's time to clear out odds and ends from the crate beneath my desk. This is where I keep items that did not make it into other columns.

 

DECEMBER 14, 2019 -- TECHNOLOGY LOOKS TO THE PAST

Technology marches on. I often recall the quote: "Technology is not technology if it was invented before you were born." There are instances when merging current technology with knowledge from the past produces interesting and beneficial results.

 

DECEMBER 7, 2019 -- STYMIE UNCLE ZELMO

Every family has an Uncle Zelmo. Who needs Google? Uncle Zelmo knows everything about everything. He dominates all discussions. There seems to be no respite short of escaping into an eggnog coma. Ah, but all is not lost. 

 

NOVEMBER 23, 2019 -- THANKSGIVING BANTER

Thanksgiving is upon us and that means families will be gathering to celebrate the day. A key challenge of this annual endurance test is to engage in harmless banter while maintaining a modicum of sanity. 

 

NOVEMBER 9, 2019 -- ARE YOU MISSING OUT?

Technology is all around us and it's moving fast. How fast? Consider this. The first website went live on August 6, 1991. As of this moment, there are over 1.7 billion websites on the Internet. Perhaps no area of technology has become more pervasive than everything related to communication. 

 

NOVEMBER 2, 2019 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

OCTOBER 12, 2019 -- HALLOWEEN PREPARATIONS

Autumn is in the air. You can tell because everything smells like pumpkin spice. With autumn underway it means that Halloween will quickly be upon us.

 

SEPTEMBER 28, 2019 -- TAILGATE TIDBITS

Fall is upon us and that means another season is also in full swing – tailgating. When you attend these parties it's important to have some tidbits to toss into any discussion. 

 

SEPTEMBER 7, 2019 -- JUST IN TIME FOR SCHOOL

With the new school year underway, it's always good to know about things that could make the lives of students and parents go a bit smoother. Sometimes, it's the little things that can make life more enjoyable. 

 

AUGUST 31, 2019 -- SPLIT SESSIONS

If you think your student/parent schedule is complicated now, just compare it to what happened in the Cadillac Area Public Schools in the mid-1970's. 

 

AUGUST 24, 2019 -- THE RESULTS ARE IN

A nationwide poll of 22,300 of the best high school students has been completed and the results are in. The poll reveals some interesting political views expressed by the young adults.

 

AUGUST 10, 2019 -- NOTHING EXCEPTIONAL

The news is filled with the many important things going on in the world. Sometimes, though, interesting items are overlooked. These are not earthshaking, but they range from informative to entertaining.

 

JULY 27, 2019 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF
Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.

 

JUNE 29, 2019-- TODAY'S KIDS HAVE IT EASY

The fact of the matter is that the kids of yesteryear were tougher because they had to be. You had to be tough just to survive the advice given to your parents by the “experts” back then. 

 

JUNE 15, 2019 -- THE CADILLAC KISSTORY PROJECT

Today, I'm launching the Cadillac KISStory Project. With your help, I want to assemble the entire tale. It's our heritage and we should “own” the story. 

 

JUNE 8, 2019 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THiS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.

 

JUNE 1, 2019 -- DAZZLE THEM WITH FACTS

To have some fun at a summer soirée just dazzle the attendees with a fact and walk away. Causing befuddlement can be quite perplexing to the befuddlee but quite entertaining for the befuddler. 

 

MAY 25, 2019 -- DON'T KISS A CHICKEN

The first big holiday weekend of the summer is upon us. This means your summer docket is probably filling up with a succession of graduation parties, family reunions, picnics and a variety of get-togethers. The key to getting maximum enjoyment out of these soirées is to avoid discussion topics that elicit mind-crushing boredom.

 

MAY 18, 2019 -- REPORTS IN THE NEWS

It's always good when the news contains things that offer a chance to learn something. Lately, reports have been issued on a variety of subjects and hence the opportunities for enlightenment have also increased. 

 

MAY 11, 2019 -- THE CADILLAC CURMUDGEON

Sometimes it's the little things that drive you to distraction. When these irritations reach critical mass they may force a person to blow off steam lest they pop a gasket. When you turn into a pro complainer, you have attained the lofty status of a curmudgeon.  

 

MAY 4, 2019 -- IDEAS GONE SIDEWAYS

Every idea is great until it doesn't work. Innovations that seem perfectly logical on the drawing board can be total disasters in the light of day. 

 

APRIL 27, 2019 -- SUMMERTIME TECH

Summer is almost here and soon the refrain “go outside and play” will be uttered by parents throughout the land. Kidlings who have been underfoot during the depths of winter will be “encouraged” to seek entertainment beyond a six inch screen. By mixing a bit of technology with outdoor fun the “pain” endured by the munchkins can be managed. 

 

APRIL 20, 2019 -- SOUND ADVICE?

The thing about advice is that it's easier to give than to receive. In order to accept advice you have to admit there may be someone who knows something you don't know. I

 

APRIL 13, 2019 -- EMBEDDED IN THE NEWS

One of the nifty things about reading newspapers is that hidden gems appear out of nowhere. Embedded in larger articles or tucked away on an inside page may be news nuggets just waiting to be uncovered. I've recently mined a few of these.

 

APRIL 6, 2019 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, when we play this game we begin with an item that relates to Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.

 

MARCH 30, 2019 -- SPRING FLINGS

It's spring. Really! The Tigers are playing real games, Bell's Oberon beer is on store shelves and the geese are back on Lake Cadillac. Luckily, there are some “springy” things in the news just perfect to fling your way. 

 

MARCH 23, 2019 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

“You are what you eat” is a generally accepted concept. If this is the case, the food scene is about to get a bit more interesting. Many meals center around a main entree, usually meat or fish. Soon, that main entree decision may involve a science component. 

 

MARCH 9, 2019 -- WINTER CLEAN UP

Have you had enough winter? Me too. A sure sign you've had enough is when you give your snow shovels names. I've given mine distinctive monikers, but I can't tell you what they are because this is a family newspaper. In a move to (hopefully) kick winter out the door, I decided to purge the crate beneath my desk of the last vestiges of winter topics. 

 

MARCH 2, 2019 -- GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS

News is a tricky thing. What is good news to someone could be bad news to someone else. In other words, news can be good and bad all at the same time. So, buckle your chin straps, keep your hands inside the ride at all times, and (in the words of legendary Detroit Lions broadcaster Van Patrick) “hang onto your Stroh's.” I have some news for you. 

 

FEBRUARY 23, 2019 -- ANYTHING BUT THE WEATHER

Are you really tired of talking about the weather? “How about that snow? Cold enough for you? The kids will be going to school in July.” Enough already! Talk about something else – anything else. Anything! Have Mercy!

 

FEBRUARY 16, 2019 -- GENERATION ALPHA

Parents were asked a simple question: “At what age does your child know more about technology than you do?”  When Hotwire, a global communications agency, gathered the data the answer was 8.7 years old. Who are these kids? They are Generation Alpha.

 

FEBRUARY 9, 2019 -- SCARY STUFF

The world is a scary place. I am not talking about small things that are a bit unnerving, like Jimmy Dean narrating his sausage commercials even though he's been dead for nineteen years. I'm talking alarming to even horrifying. If I had any hair, I could add in downright hair-raising. 

 

FEBRUARY 2, 2019 -- TOSSING NUMBERS AROUND

Our days are numbered. Dealing with digits has become a national pastime. It seems like life has become a parade of numbers marching through our brains. Dealing with all this is a daily challenge, but sometimes just tossing numbers around can be downright entertaining. 

 

JANUARY 26, 2019 -- THE ANTI-SCOWL

These are serious times. With all that's going on in the country and the world it seems like too many people are going through life with scowls on their faces. Let's take a break from that, shall we? Let's think about some things that are a bit nonsensical and thus might elicit a smile or even a laugh. 

 

JANUARY 19, 2019 -- TECHNOLOGY MARCHES ON, PART 2

Last week's column was about the explosion of technology and this week we continue along the same path. The thing about technology is that it can be interesting, humorous, awe inspiring and terrifying – all at the same time. 


JANUARY 12, 2019 -- TECHNOLOGY MARCHES ON

Technology is only technology if it was invented after you were born. Otherwise, it's the way things have always been. The problem is technology is moving so fast that “always been” is now calculated in hours. It's enough to make you dizzy. 

 

JANUARY 5, 2019 -- ROLLING INTO 2019

With 2018 in the rear view mirror it's now time to roll into 2019. There is nothing like starting a new year by hitting the ground running, so here we go. 


2018 Neff Zone Columns

 

DECEMBER 29, 2018 -- LOOKING FORWARD

The phrase “looking forward” can have a dual meaning. It can convey a sense of anticipation, as in I am looking forward to 2019. Conversely, it can indicate a sense of trepidation, as in I am not looking forward to 2019. Regardless of your interpretation, however, here comes the new year. 

 

DECEMBER 22, 2018 -- CHRISTMAS PLEASANTRIES

During the next few days many of us will be coming together with family and friends. The operative word here is “together” because in these contentious times “together” seems to be in short supply. The key to avoiding hurt feelings and black eyes is to steer conversations to innocuous pleasantries, topics that may elicit a chuckle rather than a grimace. 

 

DECEMBER 15, 2018 -- CHRISTMAS CONSIDERATIONS

Christmas is just one day. The “holiday season” might feel like it lasts a tad longer because the run-up begins around the Fourth of July. There seems to be a lot of hoopla leading up to the singular Christmas Day. Questions need to be answered. Traditions need to be invoked. 

 

DECEMBER 8, 2018 -- GIFTS FOR THOSE WHO HAVE EVERYTHING

Stumped as to what to buy that person who seems to have everything? Don't worry. I have some suggestions. Some are relatively inexpensive. Others may require you to let the moths out of your wallet and throw caution to the wind. 

 

DECEMBER 1, 2018 --  HERE TO THERE

“Over the river and through the woods, To grandmother's house we go..." Getting from here to there is uppermost in the plans of many of us during the holiday season. 

 

NOVEMBER 24, 2018 -- TIME FOR PLAY

A common phrase this time of year is “Christmas is for the kids.” Opening presents while sitting in front of a Christmas tree is one of childhood's best memories for many of us. Most of the gifts children receive involve playtime. A recent study found that playtime may be more important than many of us might assume.

 

NOVEMBER 17, 2018 -- THANKSGIVING DAY HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL 

 if you grew up in Flint back in the day, as I did, Thanksgiving meant one thing – leaving the confines of your house to attend a high school football game.

 

NOVEMBER 10, 2018 -- SHOPPING LIKE NEVER BEFORE

With the holiday shopping season upon us, you may notice some subtle changes beginning to happen in the money collection process. Stores and services are beginning to integrate technology into their traditional check-out options.

 

NOVEMBER 3, 2018 -- CASH FLOW

Economic standards are changing in America and maintaining a position of a middle-class citizen is more difficult than ever. Managing your finances may be more critical now than ever before. 

 

OCTOBER 13, 2018 -- DEADLIER THAN A SHARK ATTACK 

This brings us to one of the main activities of game day cell phone use – taking selfies. This would seem like a pretty safe endeavor, but it turns out that may not be the case. “Each year, selfies kill about 20 times more people than shark attacks.”

 

OCTOBER 6, 2018 -- NEFF ZONE NEWSREEL

There once was a time when news was not available in the nanosecond it takes to touch a device with a finger. But what if you wanted to see the news? For that you had to go to your local movie theater and there you could watch the news in sound and pictures.

 

SEPTEMBER 29, 2018 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Life should be lived in balance. That's why I love this time of year. With freshly picked apples in abundance and apple cider flowing freely you can feel the health coursing through your body. I balance that with my annual bag of candy corn.

 

SEPTEMBER 22, 2018 -- HEALTH MATTERS

I read several newspapers each day, both in print and online. One of the benefits of this is that I learn something new every day, things I did not know before. Doctors tell us that lifelong learning is helpful in maintaining a healthy mind. I don't know about you, but I need all the help I can get, so news about health is important. 

 

SEPTEMBER 15, 2018 -- INTERESTING FINDS

While perusing the news I often stumble upon interesting finds. These range from fun facts to head-scratchers to “Oh my” discoveries. 

 

SEPTEMBER 8, 2018 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, when we play this game we begin with an item that relates to Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint.

 

SEPTEMBER 1, 2018 -- BRAIN GAMES

 Have you ever purchased something and then later wondered why you bought the thing? Looking back honestly, you never wanted the thing in the first place, but you found yourself buying it anyway? 

 

AUGUST 25, 20187 -- FOOD FOR THOUGHT

One of the great mysteries of the universe was solved last week. This was an important advance in science, so now you and I can check it off our “to do” lists and move on to other critical matters. Of course, I am referring to the age-old quandary: “Is it possible to cleanly break dry spaghetti into two pieces?”

 

AUGUST 18, 2018 -- COOL CASH NEWS

It's always interesting to find out about what's going on with money. We may be moving toward a cashless society, but most of us still like the feeling of having some tangible cash in our wallets. It is just seems more reassuring than some whatever-coin out there on some cloud thingy. 

 

AUGUST 11, 2018 -- THE DOG DAYS OF SUMMER

It was really hot last weekend. When it gets too warm to be comfortable, we humans often seek the sanctuary of a building with air conditioning. Sometimes we neglect to realize that if it's hot for us it's also hot for Fido.

 

AUGUST 4, 2018 -- OPEN FOR BUSINESS

I'm back. After two weeks of family vacation the Neff Zone is once again open for business. Whether this is good news or bad news is your call. 

 

JULY 14, 2018 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.

 

JULY 7, 2018 -- SHADE TREE RUMINATIONS

This is the Fourth of July week, so what better time to think about things related to our country and state? As you sit under that shade tree trying to beat the heat (perhaps with a frosty beverage in hand), it's a perfect time for rumination. 

 

JUNE 30, 2018 -- THE HOT DOG CONUNDRUM

The Fourth of July is this week and with it comes the traditional opening of the picnic season. Enjoying food in the great outdoors is a sublime pursuit indeed. On this holiday, though, nothing is as American as a hot dog.

 

JUNE 23, 2018 -- ROLLING IN CASH

I may be old school, but somehow the time-tested phrase “rolling in cash” has a better ring to it than ”rolling in bitcoin or blockchain.” Cash is something you can feel, see, and actually spread on the floor and roll around on. Try that with your bitcoin app. 

 

JUNE 16, 2018 -- A KISS CADILLACAN MYSTERY

Have you ever been wrong about something for 43 years? I have. I thought I knew everything there was to know about the KISS visit to Cadillac in 1975. I have always been the ultimate source of all things KISS Cadillac. Until I wasn't. 

 

JUNE 9, 2018 --  A DOZEN NEWS TIDBITS

The crate beneath my desk overfloweth with news clippings. It's time to clean house. Here are twelve news tidbits gleaned from various legit sources. 

 

JUNE 2, 2018 -- A DIFFERENT BASKETBALL ENDING

Have you ever noticed that the last few minutes of a basketball game seems to take an hour? An exaggeration, sure, but it feels that way as intentional fouls, multiple time outs, and official reviews sap the drama out of the game. What if there was a different way to end games? 

 

MAY 26, 2018 -- DOLLARS AND SENSE

This is the first big holiday weekend of the summer and with it comes a spate of graduation soirees, reunions, picnics, and parties. This means there will be many opportunities to engage in chit-chat. I have a suggestion. Talk about money. 

 

MAY 12, 2018 -- WALKING A FINE LINE

I know it must be spring. For some, a clear sign is the return of robins and orioles. For me, however, it's the first joke about the fitness poles I use while taking my daily walks: “Hey, you forgot your skis.” I love to walk, but a recent series of alarms have sounded. 

 

MAY 5, 2018 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.  

 

APRIL 28, 2018 -- UNRELATED BUT RELATED

I am often asked how I select the topics for this column. We humans are a strange lot, so there is an unending stream of things about which to write. As the classic Saturday Night Live character Roseanne Rosannadanna observed: "It's always something - if it ain't one thing it's another."

 

APRIL 21, 2018 -- STAGGERING NUMBERS

 I am not a numbers guy, but sometimes numbers in the news are so staggering that even I am forced to sit up and take notice. These numbers cause my eyeballs to bulge and my brain to redline. 

 

APRIL 14, 2018 -- WILL IT EVER BE GOLF SEASON?

I was watching the Masters Golf Tournament and listening to the TV announcers describe the “brutal” conditions. Clearly, my definition and their definition of the word “brutal” were a teensy-weensy bit different. 

 

APRIL 7, 2018 -- WOW! THAT'S CRAZY!

Sometimes you come upon news that enlightens, amazes, entertains, or flummoxes. Your reaction may be “that's crazy.” In these instances, “crazy” is a good thing. 

 

MARCH 31, 2018 -- 700 IS A BIG NUMBER

This is Neff Zone column number 700. That’s a big number. The first column appeared in 2004, so 14 years is another significant number. I tell people that after 14 years half of Cadillac thinks I am an institution and the other half thinks I belong in an institution. 

 

MARCH 24, 2018 -- IS A NATIONAL POPULAR VOTE COMING?

This week's column was supposed to be about something else. Then I came across an opinion piece in the Detroit News that said: “A movement that you may not have heard of, but should know about, is called the National Popular Vote. It’s got support on the right and left, notably for different reasons, and it’s gaining momentum throughout the country.” 

 

MARCH 17, 2018 -- A MICHIGAN SCHOOL TRAGEDY

The school disaster was worse than Columbine, Virginia Tech, the University of Texas, Sandy Hook and Parkland. It stands as the deadliest school massacre U.S. history. In the end 44 people died, 38 of them students.

 

MARCH 10, 2018 -- CABIN FEVER TELEVISION

Tantalizing, wasn't it? It was a cruel joke played by Mother Nature to give us a one-week peek at spring. Now it's back to hiding indoors as another blanket of snow covers our environs. Well, there's always TV to keep us occupied. Alas, even that may cause consternation. 

 

MARCH 3, 2018 -- YOU MAY WANT TO KNOW

I'm an old guy so I have a lot of time on my hands. This gives me the opportunity to spend part of each day perusing the real news. I tend to gravitate to things I previously did not know. At the risk of being presumptuous, perhaps I have discovered some things that you may want to know. 

 

FEBRUARY 24, 2018 -- YOUR PET MAY BE LEAVING HOME

If your pet is within earshot you may not want to read this column aloud. If Fido or Fluffy overhear this, they may pack a bag and book a one-way ticket to Switzerland. 

 

FEBRUARY 17, 2018 -- PRE-SPRING CLEANING

The days are getting longer and that means spring is just around the corner. At least this is my mindset until we get another blizzard. To get into the spirit of spring, it's time to clear out a few items from the crate beneath my desk. 

 

FEBRUARY 10, 2018 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF 

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.

 

FEBRUARY 3, 2018 -- SUPER BOWL SOIREE SCHMOOZERS

The Super Bowl is tomorrow and that means you may find yourself watching the big game at a Super Bowl soiree. Since this could last pre-during-post game, and since the average NFL tilt has only eleven minutes of actual game action, you may find yourself scrambling for conversation topics to fill the dead air. 

 

JANUARY 27, 2018 -- THINGS I LEARNED

As I peruse the news, I learn something new every day. I look forward to this because keeping one's mind in shape is a worthy exercise. This week I learned a lot of things. 

 

JANUARY 20, 2018 -- SELF-DRIVING THOUGHTS

Nothing exists in isolation. Everything is interconnected. That's the basis for a concept called “the butterfly effect” the idea that small things can have impacts on a complex system. The North American International Auto Show in Detroit this week got me thinking along these lines.

 

JANUARY 13, 2018 -- LOOKING FORWARD TO 2018

The coming year could be fun. There are several items on the horizon that have the potential to make 2018 a year to remember. The best part? None have to do with politics. 

 

JANUARY 6, 2018 -- DON'T BE A WORD MUGWUMP

If you don't own the word you can't think the thought. It's a pretty basic concept. This word play is particularly fun at the beginning of each new year because various sources roll out news about words. 


2017 Neff Zone Columns

DECEMBER 30, 2017 -- NEW YEAR'S EVE PARTY FAVORS

Hang in there. The holidays are almost over. Your seemingly endless search for party chit-chat topics is fast approaching the finish line. Here are some New Year's Eve party favors, things you can just toss into the conversational mix. 

 

DECEMBER 23, 2017 --  HOLIDAY FAMILY FEUD 

“Family Feud” is one of the most popular TV game shows of all time.  By using the Ranker.com categories, you can actually create your own Family Feud game.

 

DECEMBER 16, 2017 -- HOLIDAY MONEY MATTERS

Everyone can use some extra money during the holidays. Fortunately, there are some ways to generate extra cash. You just have to be willing to think outside the box. 

 

DECEMBER 9, 2017 -- RANDOM THOUGHTS

As the holidays approach I have a lot of time to think. While other members of my family shop, I am often told to “stand over there and wait.” I can do this with the best of them, but it means I am am often alone with my random thoughts. 

 

DECEMBER 2, 2017 -- AWESOME STUFF 

What constitutes awesome for one person may not be considered awesome by another person. However, since I am easily entertained, I run across “awesomedudity” on a fairly regular basis. 

 

NOVEMBER 25, 2017 -- DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

You made it through Thanksgiving without a significant injury and now it's on to the gauntlet of holiday parties and the requisite chit-chat. The challenge is to remain sociable and inoffensive while at the same time fending off the threat of terminal boredom. 

 

NOVEMBER 17, 2017 -- I'M STARTING EARLY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON

During the past thirteen years, my policy for this column has been to focus on just positive, informative, fun, and (hopefully) entertaining news during the holiday season. This year, however, things in the news have been so contentious that I've decided invoke my policy a week early. “Bah humbug” to bad news for the next seven weeks. 

 

NOVEMBER 10, 2017 -- HEAD-SCRATCHERS

Sometimes you run across things that are confusing and difficult to understand. These items cause you to pause, wrinkle your face, furrow your brow, and scratch your head. I have often been accused of having an intellect rivaled only by garden tools, so this happens to me a lot.

 

NOVEMBER 4, 2017 -- 'FREEDOM FOUND' AN INSPIRING READ

For the past seven decades, no ski season has officially commenced unless you have seen the latest Warren Miller movie. Spectacular visuals punctuated with Miller's trademark witty narration have delighted winter sports audiences all over the globe. 

 Miller's autobiography, “Freedom Found,” is an insightful look into what made him the “godfather of action-sports film making.”

 

OCTOBER 28, 2017 -- FACTOID GIVEAWAY

Do I have a deal for you. My desk and computer are littered with so many factoids they are out of control. Most of these fall under the category of useless information, but a few are actually worth knowing. So, I have decided to clear the decks and have a factoid giveaway. You can have these at no cost which means they are priced just right. 

 

OCTOBER 21, 2017 -- THE JOBS REVOLUTION

 The jobs landscape is moving so fast that anyone who thinks he/she has a magic, long-term, job creation formula is in for a rude awakening. 

 

OCTOBER 14, 2017 -- GAME ON: PUMPKIN SPICE VS. MAPLE

Do you have pumpkin spice fatigue? Me, too. Enough is enough! I mean, does pumpkin spice really need to be in everything? 

 

OCTOBER 7, 2017 -- THINGS I DID NOT KNOW

Perusing the news recently, I unearthed several things I did not know. I like to store things like this in my cranium so I can roll them out at times when I want to appear to be smarter than I actually am.

 

SEPTEMBER 30, 2017 -- HAVING A BAD DAY?

From time to time all of us have a bad day. Whenever one happens to me I think back to those thrilling days of yesteryear before the Internet (and even before cassette tapes). Back then, all music came on vinyl records and that was also the case with comedy routines. 

 

SEPTEMBER 23, 2017 -- HURRICANOMICS

I know “hurricanomics” is not a real word. But in the wake of hurricanes Harvey and Irma, plus who knows how many more in the two months yet to go in hurricane season, perhaps new terminology needs to be invented. The economic devastation of these storms will affect the entire nation for years to come. 

 

SEPTEMBER 16, 2017 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. As usual, when we play this game we begin with an item from Big Rob's stomping grounds of Flint. 

 

SEPTEMBER 9, 2017 -- SCHOOL DAZE

The new school year is upon us and with that comes news of several education-related topics that merit our attention. Everyone, young and old alike, has a stake in assuring the success of our students.

 

SEPTEMBER 2, 2017 -- LAST HOLIDAY OF SUMMER

Once again the last holiday of summer is upon us and that means a final chance for summer picnics, family reunions, end-of-season parties, and beginning-of-season football tailgates. There will inevitably be a lot of conversational chatter going on, so it's important for you to be armed with a host of chit-chat worthy topics that will not inspire a fist fight.

 

AUGUST 26, 2017 -- IT'S NEW NEWS TO ME

I've recently come across some items in the news that are “new news” to me. Some items are cutting edge, some involve things that are just good to know, and some are sort of humorous. 

 

AUGUST 19, 2017 -- TWO GENIUS IDEAS

Sometimes ideas come along that are so monumentally brilliant they have the potential to be life altering. So stunning are these, at some point in the future we all will wonder how we ever got along without these things.

 

AUGUST 12, 2017 -- 15 FACTS

In this era of fake news, it's good to know that facts still exist. So, I burrowed  through the semi-massive pile of research in the crate beneath my desk and extracted one small fact from 15 different news articles.

 

AUGUST 5, 2017 -- TALKING ABOUT MONEY 

The daily news has something for any interest, but one thing seems to be interesting to everyone – money. There's something about the inflow and outflow of cash that causes our radar to go on full alert. 

 

JULY 22, 2017 -- OLD SCHOOL TECH

You might be interested in some new old school tech. You know, things that might actually be useful to you, as opposed to things your grandchild is positive you “need” but you can live happily without. 

 

JULY 15, 2017 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

JULY 8, 2017 -- RENEWING THE BALANCE

In his latest book, “Renewing The Balance,” Dirk Dunbar challenges readers to deeply consider how “many of us are out of balance with the world inside and around us.”

 

JULY 1, 2017 -- AWAY WE GO!

The Fourth of July is the first big official holiday of summer and for many it is also the beginning of the vacation season. Americans will be traveling all over the place in a mad rush to relax. This fits in with a new poll just out that found the number one thing Americans want to do on vacation is  – absolutely nothing.

 

JUNE 24, 2017 -- WHAT ARE PEOPLE THINKING?

Have you ever wondered what goes on in the minds of other people? Now, you and I are way above average so our minds obviously operate on a higher plane than almost everyone else. Gazing down from our enlightened perch can be interesting though. 

 

JUNE 17, 2017 -- FATHERLY WISDOM 

Tomorrow is Father's Day. If you're a dad, it's a day for your children to honor you. Those kids, however, might not realize that it's also a day that generates a huge amount of stress for the honorees. You see, after a father accumulates a few miles on his odometer, he's expected to dole out gems of wisdom (as befits his lofty status). 

 

JUNE 10, 2017 -- ITEMS OF INTEREST

As I read the news each day, I come across items that are interesting. These may be stand-alone snippets or something contained deep in a long article. I collect these and at some point I need to open the Neff Zone corral and release them into the wild. 

 

JUNE 3, 2017 -- FUN WITH LISTS 

I'm a list guy. I prefer my lists on paper. There is something very satisfying about crossing items off a paper list. Sometimes old school is the best school.

 

MAY 27, 2017 -- HOLIDAY TOPICS FOR ALL

The Memorial Day weekend signals the beginning of another summer season of graduation parties, family picnics, and reunions. With things so politically contentious, finding chit-chat topics that will not cause a fist fight is of paramount importance. 

 

MAY 13, 2017 -- PHONE TRANSFORMATION

Chances are making a simple phone call is just one of many things you do with your phone each day. Can you imagine getting through a day without your phone?

 

MAY 6, 2017 -- HEALTHY AND SAFE THIS SUMMER

When thinking about staying healthy, have you ever given any thought about the bottoms of your shoes?

 

APRIL 29, 2017 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

 It's time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. This time around we're focusing on spending money and getting little in return.

 

APRIL 22, 2017 -- HOMEGROWN WEBSITES

In 1991, there was one website on the Internet. One! The next year, 1992, the Net expanded to ten websites. As we speak, there are now about 1,200,000,000 websites.

 

APRIL 15, 2017 -- MINISCULE KNOWLEDGE

None of us know very much, but it's not our fault. In fact, by the time you read this sentence you will have fallen farther behind because 1.7 megabytes of new information is created every second. “More data has been created in the past two years than in the entire previous history of the human race.” 

 

APRIL 8, 2017 -- TAKE A WALK

Walt Whitman (1819-1892) was one of America's greatest poets. Perhaps his best know work was “Leaves of Grass,” which dealt with “democracy, nature, love, and friendship.” Less known about Whitman was his promotion of healthy lifestyles. 

 

APRIL 1, 2017 -- SPRING IN THE AIR

Spring is in the air. The signs are everywhere. Lake Cadillac is open. The sidewalks are snow free. The kids walking past my house on their way to school are wearing the traditional Northern Michigan spring ensemble: flip-flops, shorts, ski jacket.

 

MARCH 25, 2017 -- LIVE LONGER AND FEEL BETTER

We live in contentious times. Still, there may be something upon which we can all agree. An answer to a question that assuredly would get a 100 percent “yes” response. Would you like to live longer and feel better while doing it? 

 

MARCH 18, 2017 -- INTERESTING TO KNOW

There is such tornadic activity in the news cycle these days it's enough to make the propeller on your beanie break loose and launch into outer space. To be sure, the main stories capture the headlines. However, there are aspects to these that you might be interested to know.

 

MARCH 11, 2017 -- FACTOID FIRE SALE

I can't get my feet under my desk because the crate where I archive my research runneth over. I count 37 of these crate escapees, so it's time to set them free. I've decided to just choose some at random and extract one factoid from each. 

 

MARCH 4, 2017 -- THE VOCABULARY EXPLOSION

If English is your language of choice, you generally use about one percent of the words available in the English vocabulary. That's seems like a small amount, but there are more than 1,022,000 English words. 

 

FEBRUARY 25, 2017 -- MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE

Nothing exists in isolation. Very few issues have just a single layer, so what's on the surface is often misleading. Sometimes peeling back the layers reveals complications that are not visible at first look.

 

FEBRUARY 18, 2017 -- KNICK-KNACK PADDY FACT

I don't know about you, but have about had it “up to here” with so-called alternative facts. Back in the day these were called “bald-faced lies,” but I guess thinking this makes me an an out-of-it curmudgeon. So be it. Anyway, I thought perhaps if you are of like mind, you might enjoy reading some actual true facts for a change.

 

FEBRUARY 11, 2017-- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's time for the first 2017 round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction.

 

FEBRUARY 4, 2017 -- THE SMILE UMBRELLA

 Join me in this simple prayer. “Dear Lord, we beseech you to grant us three hours with no politics this Super Bowl Sunday. Amen.” 

 

JANUARY 21, 2017 -- GET OFF MY LAWN!

You are awakened in the morning by the police pounding on your door. They are here to “arrest” your lawn, seize your house, and throw you out into the street. Far fetched, right? Not really. It's all legal (in the U.S. of A) under a procedure known as “civil asset forfeiture.”

 

JANUARY 14, 2017 -- WALL-ONOMICS

Consider the proposal to build a wall along the Mexico/U.S.A border. Take all the politics out of it. Just consider the logistics. Building such a wall has some very real and formidable challenges.

 

JANUARY 7, 2017 -- ONWARD TO 2017

The transition from 2016 to 2017 presents a conundrum. Should we approach the coming year with elation or trepidation? After the riotous political season that ended 2016, perhaps the words of Michelangelo might apply: “The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.”


2016 Neff Zone Columns

 

DECEMBER 31, 2016 -- YEAR-END CLEANUP

This year comes to a close today. It certainly has been interesting. So much has gone on that the research crate beneath my desk overflowed at times. This brings us to a few items to clean up as 2016 draws to a conclusion.

 

DECEMBER 24, 2016 -- CHRISTMAS BY THE NUMBERS

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, everyone took a deep breath and reached for the aspirin bottle. Whew! Having fun is hard work. In many ways Christmas is a numbers game. It turns out the holiday reveals some interesting digits. 

 

DECEMBER 17, 2016 -- HOLIDAY KNICK-KNACKS

It's that time of year. Crunch time. The week before Christmas. I figure you have all the big stuff covered. Let me fill in the corners with a few holiday knick-knacks.

 

DECEMBER 10, 2016 -- NEW OLD TECH FOR SENIORS THIS CHRISTMAS 

With the holidays upon us finding the right gifts for people on our Christmas list becomes problematic. The best presents are items that the recipient will actually use. One perplexing category is the senior citizen. 

 

DECEMBER 3, 2016 -- RANDOM THOUGHTS

Right now I'm playing a waiting game. Ski season has not started due to no snow and Christmas is three weeks away. It's a good time to just let some random thoughts escape from my noggin.

 

NOVEMBER 26, 2016 -- THE HOLIDAYS ARE UPON US

The holiday season is upon us. With the spirit of the season in mind, I'm renewing my policy of the past twelve years. During the holidays this column is devoted to positive, informative, fun, and (hopefully) entertaining news.

 

OCTOBER 29, 2016 -- LESSONS FROM THE FACTORY FLOOR

This political season you've heard a lot about the manufacturing and jobs outlook in the United States. It's common to hear politicians bemoan the “fact” that China has it all and the U.S. is going down the tubes. It's expedient rhetoric, but outside the make-believe world of politics and down on the factory floor a different reality is taking shape.

 

OCTOBER 22, 2016 -- THE OBLIVIOUS FACTOR

The word “oblivious” is the focus of today's discussion. What brought this word to mind was a Speak Out letter to the Cadillac News from my friend Bernie Bovee. In the letter Bernie expressed his concern about “the pedestrian automobile challenge at Cadillac's major intersections.” I share Bernie's trepidation. 

 

OCTOBER 15, 2016 -- STRESSFUL NUMBERS

I try to avoid numbers. I'm a words guy, so deep in my noggin is the suspicion that numbers only exist to confuse me. However, stressful numerals keep popping up in the news. A particular number may illustrate an uncomfortable point, drive home a disturbing fact, or simply cause me to scratch my head in consternation.

 

OCTOBER 8, 2016 -- GOING SOUTH

Sometimes, regardless of good intentions, things just go south. No one means for things to go south and everyone tries to make sure things do not go south, but despite our best efforts some things just wind up headed in a southerly direction. 

 

OCTOBER 1, 2016 -- KISSERCISE

The CAVB has now placed four KISStorical plaques around Cadillac. Music fans can now walk from plaque to plaque. Each all-weather marker features classic photos and an explanation of why the spot is significant in the story. Call it a “KISSercise” experience. The route is 2.4 miles long and takes in some great Cadillac scenery.

 

SEPTEMBER 24, 2016 -- MINING FOR NEWS GEMS

One of my favorite things to do while reading the news is to spot seemingly small facts buried within larger articles. It's sort of like being in a mine and uncovering a gem.

 

SEPTEMBER 17, 2016 -- TECHNOLOGY MARCHES ON 

Technology is only technology if it was invented after you were born. Otherwise, it's just the way things have always been.

I thought about this when I came upon a news item about the demise of a simple piece of “technology” – the headphone jack. 

 

SEPTEMBER 3, 2016 -- LABOR DAY CHATTER

Once again the last holiday of summer is upon us and that means a final chance for summer picnics, family reunions, and end-of-season parties. There will inevitably be a lot of conversational chatter going on, so it's important for you to be armed with a host of chit-chat worthy topics that will not inspire a fist fight.

 

AUGUST 27, 2016 -- MOTT FOOTBALL

I played high school football. I coached high school football. I was the “Voice of the Cadillac Vikings” on radio for many years. I've been a spectator since I was a kindergartener (in 1953) attending Flint Northern games with my father. I love high school football. All that said, I fear for the game.

 

AUGUST 20, 2016 -- HEADS UP!

I don't walk around while staring down at my phone. This is mainly because I am not coordinated enough to walk and do a second thing at the same time. Being a klutz has its advantages though. Having your head up allows you to be more aware of what's going on around you in the real world. 

 

AUGUST 13, 2016 -- BITS AND PIECES

There is big news and there is small news. I have a tendency to accumulate a stockpile of small news items, to the point at which they overrun my desk. So, it's time to clear the decks. Make way for a whole bunch of items from my small news files.

 

AUGUST 6, 2016 -- ELECTION TERMINOLOGY GUIDE

Words matter. With the primaries behind us and the actual election now underway, we voters will be bombarded with a tsunami of words over the next ninety days. Therefore it's important to have our election terminology well in hand.

 

JULY 30, 2016 -- AMEN, SISTER!

One glare from Sister Veronita or Sister Robertus could silence a room and make the toughest students behave like members of a church choir. I thought of this when I saw a letter to the editor from an IHM sister, Sister Mary Jane Herb, in last Sunday's Detroit Free Press. It was such a compelling letter about today's political atmosphere that I sent it to all my classmates (Class of 1965). I received several replies, with the most common comment being “Amen, Sister.”

 

JULY 16, 2016 -- BE A HERO

It's not often that you get to be a hero, provide an invaluable service to medical research, help millions of people all over the world, and have loads of fun doing it. For free. Using only your thumbs.

 

JULY 9, 2016 -- GET OFF MY LAWN! GRRR!

Summer is a time of year to be endured while we wait for next ski season. At least that's what I tell my family when the temperature hovers near ninety degrees, causing me to go into my grumpy old man routine.

 

JULY 2, 2016 -- KEY WORDS

In almost every news item there is a key word. Sometimes that word is obvious and is just fun to spot. Other times the word dictates the meaning of the entire item.

 

JUNE 25, 2016 -- DID YOU KNOW THIS?

This time of year with all sorts of picnics and gatherings to attend, it's a good idea to have a bevy of conversation topics at your disposal. With all the contentious presidential race hoo-hah in the air, it's also nice to be able to divert attention in directions that won't cause black eyes.

 

JUNE 18, 2016 -- NEED SOME GOOD NEWS?

It has been a rough couple of weeks. It seems like every time you turn on the television or open a newspaper one more horrific story smacks you right between the eyes. You just catch your breath only to have the wind knocked out of you again. So, are you ready for some good news for a change?

 

JUNE 4, 2016 -- SNAGGING THE NEWS

One of the best things about reading the news is that there is always something to discover every single day. Scientists tell us that the sum total of human knowledge is doubling every twelve months and soon it will double every twelve hours. That's a lot of information zipping past us, so it's pretty easy to snag items as they pass by.

 

MAY 28, 2016 -- WISE GUY COMMENTARY

This is Neff Zone column number 600. Back in 2004, who could have guessed that I'd still be spouting my weekly nonsense in 2016? In a non-scientific, unofficial, and almost nonexistent poll of the readers of this column, it has been determined that fifty percent of readers think my twelve years of longevity means that I have become an institution. The other fifty percent think I belong in an institution. That said, onward we go. 

 

MAY 21, 2016 -- CREEPING ME OUT

Some things are just plain creepy or at the very least a bit disturbing. It's different for everyone, but we all have things that that make our skin crawl, raise our hackles, trip our inner radar alert system, or just trigger our “yuckification” reflex.

 

MAY 14, 2016 -- MONEY MATTERS

“Show me the money,” is an often heard refrain. Right or wrong, when you boil down a news item to its essence, more times than not it comes down to money. This holds true in many aspects of life.

 

MAY 7, 2016 -- WHAT I LEARNED THIS WEEK

About 95 percent of my research winds up in the circular file. After 597 Neff Zone columns, that's a lot of material gone by the wayside. The plain truth is that there is so much happening every day, I am continually uncovering new things about which to write.

 

APRIL 30, 2016 -- HARD TO BELIEVE
Sometimes you come upon news that is hard to believe. You realize an item is true, but it just makes you want to shake your head. Sometimes the item makes you angry, sometimes sad, and sometimes incredulous.

 

APRIL 23, 2016 -- DID YOU KNOW?

One of my favorite things about reading newspapers is uncovering things I did not know before. Sometimes it's the crux of an article, but many times it's a nugget that is only revealed upon reading the entire piece.

 

APRIL 16, 2016 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF

Well kidlings, it's a time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

APRIL 9, 2016 -- LIGHTER SPRING FARE

The news these days is weighing me down. Ah, but now spring is upon us and so we are all due a break. It's time to take a breath and consider some lighter fare. Things that will not overwork our noggins.

 

APRIL 2, 2016 -- ROLODEX WRITING

Back in the olden days, before Al Gore invented the Internet (wink, wink), people kept their contacts list in a Rolodex. Writers had a different use for a Rolodex. They would put one topic on each card. If they experienced writer's block, they would spin the Rolodex and whatever card flew out would be the writing topic of the day. 

 

MARCH 26, 2016 -- CSI FLINT

Let me pose a hypothetical situation and then ask some hypothetical questions. This will all relate to an under reported incident within the scope of the Flint water crisis, but it will take some time to get there.

 

MARCH 19, 2016 -- BY THE NUMBERS
I'm a words guy, not a numbers guy. Sometimes, however, looking at numbers is interesting, to say the least. They can reveal and explain some things better than thousands of words. Or, they can raise a question in stark black and white.

 

MARCH 12, 2016 -- THOUGHT YOU MIGHT LIKE TO KNOW

Every once in a while I run across items that interest me and are worthy of passing along to other people. After all, you never know when you might need a tidbit to impress your friends.

 

MARCH 5, 2016 -- CLIPS FROM THE CRATE

As I peruse the news I clip out items from newspapers that might be of use later. I toss these into a crate beneath my desk. The crate overfloweth, so now might be a good time to see what has been accumulating.

 

FEBRUARY 27, 2016 -- GLIMMERS OF HOPE IN FLINT 
In Flint, there were glimmers of hope before the water crisis and those rays are still trying to make it through the clouds. I've seen it first hand. This past summer my wife and I were taken on a tour of downtown Flint. Here's what we saw.

 

FEBRUARY 20, 2016 -- IF CADILLAC WERE FLINT
It's tough to imagine what it's like to live in Flint right now. We can read about it, but that's an impersonal exercise. Perhaps if we think about some of the same circumstances being applied to our lives here in Cadillac, it might make the picture a bit clearer. 

 

FEBRUARY 13, 2016 -- PERSONAL THOUGHTS ON FLINT
It would be no exaggeration to say that we've read millions of words about Flint water over the past few years. In short, I believe I have the credentials to make some personal observations. (This may take more than one column.)

 

FEBRUARY 6, 2016 -- DUNBAR'S BOOK ENTERTAINING AND THOUGHT PROVOKING

There is no doubt that Dirk Dunbar was the greatest basketball player in the history of Cadillac High. In a new book, “Confessions of a Basketball Junkie,” Dunbar takes us along on a journey of discovery.

 

JANUARY 30, 2016 -- TOSSING NUMBERS AROUND
I'm a words guy, not a numbers guy. However, as I do research for this column I often run into numbers that are interesting or amusing. 

 

JANUARY 23, 2016 -- AN ELECTION I WOULD LIKE TO SEE
I wrote a column in the Cadillac News on August 23, 2004 - twelve years ago! (I've written 582 columns and that was column number three.) The column could have been written yesterday. Twelve years and, if anything, the situation has deteriorated.

 

JANUARY 16, 2016 -- YOU CAN'T MAKE UP THIS STUFF
It's a time for another round of "You Can't Make Up This Stuff," the game based on my brother Big Rob's theory that reality is stranger than any fiction. 

 

JANUARY 9, 2016 -- NEWS AS ENTERTAINMENT
Sometimes news is just news, but sometimes news can also be a source of entertainment. Many times all it takes is the patience to let a story unfold and if you do that developments can get pretty entertaining.

 

JANUARY 2, 2016 -- RANDOM RUMINATIONS FOR 2016

As we head into the new year, there are a lot of random thoughts rolling around in my cranium. Now seems like a good time to empty my attic as we move into 2016.